How to build self-confidence is not an easy task but there are ways to make it so much easier. But ask yourself this…

Have you ever felt like you weren’t good enough?

Struggling with your own image and looking up to so many unrealistic beauty standards?

Yeah, me as well.

I was struggling with some severe body issues, and it took some deep soul searching to overcome this an improve my self-confidence.

Now, I am going to share them with you.

In this post you are going to learn the tips that I was able to implement that tremendously helped me build my self-confidence.

And hopefully these tips will help you on your quest of how to build self-confidence

1) Invest in yourself

Take a step back and put some time into yourself.

The reason why you need to invest in yourself is because you allow yourself to have growth.

Searching ” How to build self-confidence” is the start but now, go further now.

So many people fall victim to the mindset that they are “worthless” or “undesirable” when we all know that isn’t true.

Take a few minutes a day to invest in yourself.

Investing in yourself can include things such as:

Meditation– Meditation is amazing because you give yourself time to be alone.

Clearing your mind and being able to focus on positive aspects of yourself. While you do this, take the time to say some positive things about yourself.

    • Highlight how beautiful you are, even if you don’t believe it.
    • Remind yourself that you are worth living for, tell yourself that you are confident and deserving of love.

This takes less than 5 minutes a day. You can do it first thing in the morning or before bed, or just anytime that you have.

I prefer to do this in the morning because you have a more positive outlook on life as you go about your day. 

Do Something Small for Your Health– For me it was taking my vitamins. 

Specific vitamins do different things. B-12 is amazing for increasing energy and reducing depression.

Taking your vitamins also can help with any insecurities that you may have from the inside out.

    • If you have problems with acne and that makes you insecure, zinc helps to clear up acne.
    • I had that same issue with acne, and it took 2 seconds to take my zinc vitamins and I noticed a difference in my skin in under 2 weeks.

Not only did it help me feel more confident, but I did also not have to exhaust myself to feel beautiful, I started to naturally notice it. 

Do you have to start taking vitamins? No, but start doing something to invest in yourself.

Whether that is exercising, drinking more water, or changing your bed sheets.

2) Daily Mantras

How to build self confidence

Daily affirmations are more powerful than people may think about.

I love daily affirmations because you are putting your voice out into the world.

You are able to get things off your chest and put them out into the world as a way to bring that power back to you.

Whatever negative thoughts or concerns about yourself, let them go.

If you struggle with your body, feeling that you are “too fat”, “too skinny”, “not pretty enough”, etc.

Let it go.

It takes less than 5 minutes. 

Instead of repeating the negativity, say positive things about yourself. Say things like:
  • “I am beautiful”
  • “Everything I do is a learning lesson”
  • “I have a beautiful smile”
  • “I’m kind and I deserve love”
  • “I’m not (fat, skinny, ugly, etc.) and I am worth love”
  • “My body is beautiful regardless of any flaws”
  • “My (stretch marks, scars, cellulite) doesn’t take away from my beauty”
  • “I am wholesome, funny, gorgeous, and amazing”
  • “My (smile, hair, eyes, etc.) are stunning”
  • “I love myself greatly”

While there are many more, personalize it to your experience.

No, it’s not corny, no it’s not lame. 

It is powerful and worth it, because you are. 

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How to build self confidence

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Read about some important things to do when you have anxiety, it will help your mental health during this journey

3) Stop Comparing Yourself 

How to build self confidence

How to build self-confidence is closely tied to how you view yourself.

You may see a woman who looks beautiful, and the thought may cross your mind of “I wish I looked like her.”

Stop

Let’s have a quick chat on why.

Another person’s beauty or attractiveness does not diminish yours.

Contrary to what you may believe, someone can be attractive and there does not need to be competition between you and them. 

You don’t have to look at their perfections and compare your flaws.

Honestly, you never know what someone else is insecure about so don’t beat yourself up over anyone else.

It’s as simple as that. 

Picture this:

So, it’s a nice day outside and you’re picking out an outfit and your first comments about yourself are…

“This doesn’t look good on me,” “I wish I was skinner,” “I look so ugly today.”

Surprisingly, this is just your low self-confidence, insecurity, and nerves speaking. 

Most of us suffer from low self-confidence and low self-esteem due to the simple fact that we live in a society that is based on looks. 

The worst part about having low self-confidence is the simple fact that we are our biggest critics.

As someone who struggles with their weight, in an extremely fat phobic society, my self-confidence has been crushed from a very young age.

And if you are like me in any way, you may have been feeling this way for a very long time. 

Take some time to realize that

The thief of joy is COMPARISON”

4) Take A Break from social media

While social media may be a fun place to get new fashion tips, check on your favorite celebrities or catch up on the latest trends. 

It can get nasty.

Social media is a place where perfection is seen as the most important thing in anyone’s life. 

The bodies have to be perfect, the cars, the houses, the skin…everything has to be perfect.

It’s exhausting!

I am an advocate of taking breaks from social media. I even spoke about it before on my blog. 

Check out this post about self-care things to do while taking a break from social media

Sometimes we can get so overwhelmed with these unrealistic images being thrown everywhere. 

From the waist training to the photoshop and overly face tuned images. 

It is way too much to even look at on a daily basis and it is not healthy. Truly, it isn’t.

Even if you just reduce your time on social media from 3 hours to 2 or even 1, give yourself some time to reduce these images. 

It will give you a better sense of self.

5) Walk With Your Head Up

As an introvert, I hate to be noticed sometimes. 

I personally feel like I’m about to embarrass myself or that I don’t look good. 

This led to me walking with my head down everywhere that I went. 

Even when I knew that I looked good, my head was always down.

Which led me to feeling down and feeling so low about myself. 

Sounds familiar?

9 times out of 10 you are walking with your head down and you probably don’t even realize it. 

Or you do and you know that. 

Lift your head up. 

Just by lifting your head up you can do wonders for your self-confidence because you are no longer looking down at yourself.

You also show the world that you hold yourself high even when you don’t feel like it.

Lift your head up and poke your chest out a bit. Not only will it make you feel more confident, but you will walk with more confidence. 

6) Dress For Yourself

What do you like to wear? 

This simple question may fly over your head, but it is a good thing to think about.

I noticed that when my self-confidence was low, I didn’t care how I looked. 

I would wear sweatpants and a hoodie. Every. Single. Day. 

Even though that’s something that was comfortable and it’s something I liked, it wasn’t what I actually wanted to wear.

Why the hell is it 80 degrees outside and I’m trying to put on sweatpants?

It’s simple, I was so insecure about my body that I wanted to cover it up no matter what the weather was like or how uncomfortable it made it. 

Then it hit me, I needed to dress for myself and dress in a way that made me feel more confident. 

That was simply me swapping out a pair or sweats for some jeans. 

Doing that not only made me “look” more “presentable” but at the same time I felt better. 

It was something that I liked which made me more confident because I didn’t feel like I was hiding. 

Try dressing in a way that makes you smile and that will naturally raise your self-confidence.

Wear things that are more flattering for your body type.

Things that highlight your features.

7) Stop Trying to Impress Others

Have you ever put something on, and your first thought was about how other people would view you?

Yeah, let’s put an end to that. You are not a global people pleaser. 

It takes a few seconds to change your dialogue from what would “they” think to what do “I.”

If you spend your entire life trying to please other people, you will lose sight of what is important to you and who you are.

The best ways to raise your self-confidence and self-esteem is to aim to please yourself in a way that makes you smile.

It can be super tough at first, but it is very freeing to stop caring what other people think about you.

If you like something, don’t be ashamed to say you like that. 

For example, you love how you look in dresses but your mother, brother, and/ or grandmother thinks you look fat in it. 

Now when you get dressed you keep on thinking about what they are saying, and you won’t wear the dress. 

Your self-confidence is now tied into what others have told you.

So, in result of that you, dress to please them or impress them instead of yourself. 

Low self-confidence and self-esteem have one thing in common, the word

SELF

When you do things to make yourself happy and you do it unapologetically.

8) Stop Living for Others Period

self confidence

This is a little bit different than my other point of trying to impress people. 

Trying to impress people is more of trying to please people and make people happy for you.

When you stop living for others, you aren’t worried about their opinions at all. 

You are not worried about their thoughts of you, their opinions of you, or even their presence. 

It’s time that you live for yourself. 

And guess what? You are no longer caring about anyone else’s concerns about you are now only focusing on your well-being. 

I noticed the improvement in my life when I stopped living for other people and their approval and started living for myself. 

9) Invest In a New Wardrobe

Drop some money on some new clothes sis!

Wearing the same old clothes can make you feel trapped in a cycle. 

The problem with having the same old clothes on your self-confidence is that you start to associate those clothes with those feelings. 

If you want to build your self-confidence and raise your self-esteem, you need a fresh wardrobe.

Now, I’m not saying go and spend thousands of dollars on new clothes. 

But what I am saying is to make some upgrades.

Out with the old and in with the new you.

Get rid of some of those clothes that hide you.

Go out and buy some new clothes that will make you smile when you put them on. Remember, that it is okay to come out of your comfort zone.

Building your self-confidence comes from you getting out of your comfort zone.

The easiest way to do this is by upgrading your wardrobe.

A simple shirt upgrade can do wonders for your confidence.

10) Realize That It’s Okay to Not Be Favored

One of the biggest things you can do for your self-confidence, self-esteem and any insecurities you have is to realize that it is okay to not be favored.

Not everyone has to find you attractive, funny, or favorable in any way.

But guess what? That’s perfectly okay

Our low self-confidence and self-esteem come from the constant worry that we need to be liked and adored by everyone.

We feel the need, as humans, to want to be desirable and attractive to everyone but that’s simply not the reality.

When you become more accepting of that, the more confident you will become.

Solely due to the fact that you no longer feel like there is a spotlight on you.

The “spotlight” effect in psychology is a basic study where we always feel like we are in a spotlight and that we are the center of attention all the time.

This can be directly linked to low self-confidence and low self-esteem due to the simple fact that we are always concerned with the views of others and being liked by everyone.

Accept that you are stunning, and the opinions of others will not matter.

And, there you have it!

A super simple guide on how to build self-confidence and bring you happiness.

Take the time to do these things and you will see a huge change in yourself as well as your self-confidence.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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